Tuesday, March 1, 2011

The REALITY CHECK Series: Intro

I once had a client ask me to come help her with a track she was working on. When I arrived, she played me the song, which was basically her singing completely dry over an assemblage of loops. After informing me that she had 30 minutes to spend, she literally said, "Now, can you just teach me how to make it sound like the songs on the radio?" I didn't know whether to pee my pants in laughter, walk out, or shake her like that scene in Airplane. Unfortunately for her, at the end of my 30 minute instruction she didn't come away with a radio-ready track; she came away with a sense of disappointment about how complex recording/mixing was.


Now, who do I blame for her naïvety? The internet. Why? Because everywhere you click there are blog posts, videos, and websites with titles like: "Compression Made Easy," "5 Mixing Tricks for Platinum Vocals," "Simple EQ Tips for the Perfect Guitar Sound," and "Learn to Record Like Bruce Swedien in 5 Hours!"

You want to know the truth? Recording is NOT easy, quick, or painless. In fact, here's the Reality Check:

The average home-recordist will probably never produce a radio-quality recording.

Anyone who tells you otherwise is trying to sell you something.

Why am I smashing your hopes and dreams into tiny pieces, you ask? Because the truth can set you free. Freedom from what? Freedom from the disappointment, frustration, and embarrassment that you experience when you compare your track to others on iTunes. Why does the latest hit single sound warm, sparkly, loud, and balanced, while your track sounds like a 6th grade orchestra captured with a cassette recorder from 1981? I'll tell you why:

Home Recordists can't produce radio-ready tracks because they face several crippling limitations.

The goal of the REALITY CHECK series is to point out those limitations in order to help you understand why your track is only 85% there. I believe that coming to terms with "reality" will help you appreciate how great you're actually doing and hopefully encourage you to stop banging your head against the wall in desperation.

Unfortunately, many of us think our countless searches will eventually reveal that one tutorial that will unlock all the mysteries of recording. When that magical day happens, we'll be the King Midas of the recording world. Okay, you're not that dumb, but many home-recordists sometimes act like frustrated alchemists, mistakenly believing that it's possible to turn lead into gold. So, let me fill you in on the truth: try all you want, but recording a crappy vocal into a Mbox with a $50 condenser in your kitchen ain't gonna earn you a Grammy. Accept this fact and maybe you can start having fun recording music again.

The other benefit of understanding your major limitations is that when you are ready to step it up a notch, you'll know what you have to do to take it to the next level.

So listen, as a home recordist, you're probably producing some pretty cool recordings given your knowledge and equipment limitations. Will you ever produce radio-quality recordings with your existing limitations? Nope. But that's what the REALITY CHECK series is about. Figure out what those limitations are so you can stop beating yourself up about where you're at in your recording journey. Maybe then you can enjoy the ride.

In a few days, I will start off the series with the first post:




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5 comments:

  1. I mostly agree, except for this line: "recording a crappy vocal into a Mbox with a $50 condenser in your kitchen ain't gonna earn you a Grammy."

    Only two parts of that are true: The crappy vocal and not winning Grammy. The Mbox and $50 condenser are irrelevant.

    -Kim.

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  2. I agree mostly as well - I think a grammy could still be won if the right person was singing into a $50 condenser with an MBox.

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  3. Hmm Auto-tune, Mbox + 50$ Condenser. haha

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  4. It's not the equipment but who is behind the equipment!
    I could tell you that I do have friends that are on tour working on macbook pros,mbox etc that get amazing results..

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  5. While I would echo your derision of the "5 Tips to X Y Z!" lists, I do not echo your derision for the audience. Sorry, but this doesn't come across as being informative, or a reality check. It reads like someone who's a bit better than average telling the kids what's up in the most appallingly condescending manner possible. And then you end it with the promise of an first post? This isn't it? I just read a bunch of insulting drivel only to find you've not even got started?

    I'm glad I'm not the beginner that found you, and I urge all beginners to not bother with a followup visit. As someone with 20 years' experience in the field, and *many* radio plays under his belt, I can tell you that this is generalised nonsense. Does this guy know what you're doing? This is pretty standard fare, "pro" engineers have a terror of the home-game and will put you down at every turn. Real pros however will let their skills show, and as teachers will *raise you up*. Maybe some things are beyond you, sure, but with investment and time yes you can, yes you damn well can get radio play (if anyone cares much about radio by then - and that's a giveaway as to this blogger's intention).

    For shame.

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